網誌分類：Murmur |
網誌日期：2010-01-02 23:01
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Just hate it.
Being so insignificant.
The world seems okay if I vanish. I don't think anybody will notice.
No. They may cry for sometime, which I expect, and then recover very soon.
After all, every human is a dust in the world. Who care?
Yes I know, God cares.
But God is not living with me.
I mean, yes He is with me, but He can't really sitting here with me, eating with me, studying with me or even talking to me.
Life is all alone.
And you know, it feels so odd crying alone soundlessly on bed.
Sometime I just can't stop admire myself being so pro in acting and pretending.
'Good' job.
It is true that I have good family, friends, and classmates. I love them so deeply.
But it is also not a lie that difficulties need no one but only me.
Others can do nothing to help me.
I just tell myself that 'be strong be tough'. Challeges are everywhere and can't be avoided. First I met CE and now A-level. And after this A-level, I will definitely still have much to fight against. So I can't be weak. It is so wrong to be weak, because if I am weak even facing some tiny things, how can I be tough facing big things? It is so wrong to be weak.
But human are really weak. I can't stop from being so depressed. On one hand I tell myself to be strong and on another hand I am thinking of giving up. Sooooo messy is my mind, sooo heavy is my head.
The world seems okay if I vanish. I don't think anybody will notice.
No. They may cry for sometime, which I expect, and then recover very soon.
After all, every human is a dust in the world. Who care?
Yes I know, God cares.
But God is not living with me.
I mean, yes He is with me, but He can't really sitting here with me, eating with me, studying with me or even talking to me.
Life is all alone.
And you know, it feels so odd crying alone soundlessly on bed.
Sometime I just can't stop admire myself being so pro in acting and pretending.
'Good' job.
It is true that I have good family, friends, and classmates. I love them so deeply.
But it is also not a lie that difficulties need no one but only me.
Others can do nothing to help me.
I just tell myself that 'be strong be tough'. Challeges are everywhere and can't be avoided. First I met CE and now A-level. And after this A-level, I will definitely still have much to fight against. So I can't be weak. It is so wrong to be weak, because if I am weak even facing some tiny things, how can I be tough facing big things? It is so wrong to be weak.
But human are really weak. I can't stop from being so depressed. On one hand I tell myself to be strong and on another hand I am thinking of giving up. Sooooo messy is my mind, sooo heavy is my head.
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4年後的我︰
間中仍會有這些感覺呢...
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